Little boys
I am pleased with myself, I have managed to refrain from ranting for a good while, but today the day has come for a good old letting off of steam.
This was prompted by a sight I seem to be greeted with time and time again on my daily commute, and even from my house! That sight is grown men wee-ing by the roadside.
I disgusts me. Why on earth do they have to do it?? Just becuase you can doesn’t mean you have to. Believe it or not there are indoor facilities available in most places you are likely to drive. Women seem to cope just fine, don’t you notice? How often do you catch a lady crouched behind the car by the side of the A34 - I haven’t seen it in 6 years of doing a 37 mile commute. But men - at least 3 times a week.
If you really have to do it then why not escape into the bushes? Why do it against the wheel of your lorry, or just on the kerb? Why do it 20 yards from the turn into the 24 hour Tesco’s? Why do it next to the rubbish bin that everyone needs to use in the only layby for several miles?
Especially do not pull into my residential street, in a village with public toilets, 3 pubs and a garage (and lots of bushes in the coutryside surrounding it) and do it opposite my house! For heaven’s sake, how old are you? When blokes need the toilet, do they suddenly revert to being 4 years old, hopping up and down on one leg and tugging their mum’s sleeve because they “can’t wait”? Where is that adult sense of control and social grace?
To finish with the beginning - this rant was finally precipitated by pulling out of the gate at my work - a lovely pine wood setting, but on a busy B road - to see a Hooray Henry relieving himself on our kerb, by a tree. He zipped himself up fast and leapt into his Porsche-made substitute for manhood and screamed off. Sadly for him I caught him up in traffic 1/2 mile on. I wondered how I could tell him about the CCTV cameras that watch the gate into our land…
Really made me laugh reading this, especially the Porshe comment and I loved the pic! its probably all very deep and meaningful stuff about marking territory or being in control!
They do it because they can!
Bunch of wusses the lot of them.
This is why women always seem to spend forever in the loo - we go before we actually need to, hence there is a bigger queue and it takes us longer to go.